Friday, January 4, 2013

Fit Bit (living in abuse)


Fit Bit (How do I live in abuse?)

Dear Kimberly,

    I have an abusive boyfriend.  He is better now then he was and I have learned how to not make him as angry as I used to.  My children are starting to treat me as he treats me.  I love my family, but I don’t know how to live like this.  The name-calling and degrading comments are now the issue more then the physical violence.  I get so depressed and overwhelmed.  I don’t know what to do.  I want a better life.  How do I survive this abuse, I am not willing to leave my situation.

Sincerely,
How do I live in abuse?

Dear Abused,

    I understand that you do not want to leave your home.  I too was an abused wife and did not want to leave.  What happened to me, as I continued on in the abusive marriage, I became a shadow of my old self.  I started to feel as though I was nothing and I believed the lies my husband told me.  I believed I was worthless, fat, un- loveable and stupid.  The truth is, I am not any of those things and never have been.  I am a beautiful child of God. (Regardless of my weight or IQ)  You too are His beautiful child!

Get out of this.   If not for you, do it for your children.  They will become what your life is.  If you are unwilling to leave at least seek counseling immediately.  Do not accept the negative comments.  When your boyfriend tells you something bad, tell him he is wrong, you are a beautiful child of God, and you do not accept his lies.  Believe that in your heart.  Ask God for His strength and guidance.

    Living in an abusive relationship is not Gods desire for you.  Jesus died that you may be saved. (John 3:16) God instructs men to cherish their wives, as Christ cherishes the church.  (Ephesians5: 25))  Any thing less is not of God. I know from personal experience that it is better to be a single mom then it is to be in an abusive relationship. (1 Cor. 7:8)

John 3:16  “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life.”

Ephesians 5:25  “ Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;”

1 Corinthians 7:8  “I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, it is good for them if they abide even as I.”  (Paul was single and not having sex)

1 Corinthians 7:14  “For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband; else were your children unclean; but now they are holy.”


How do you live in abuse?  You don’t!

  I don’t believe in living together.  I pray that you can get out of the current abuse.  I pray the Lord will change your boyfriends’ heart.  I pray God will give you courage.

Be fit, be blessed and please seek professional help,

Kimberly


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