Saturday, July 7, 2012

Fit Bit (can't get rid of my fat pants)

Fit Bit (can’t get rid of my fat pants)
Dear Kimberly,
     Recently I discovered my husband (Someday to be my ex-husband we’ve filed for legal separation.) reminds me of my fat pants.  He’s comfortable, but not good for me.  He has been unfaithful countless times.  Yet, He says He is sorry and wants to work our marriage out.  I want to forgive him, but he keeps repeating the same behavior.   I did a few months back; once again I caught him in infidelity.  I want this marriage to be a happy one.  We have two wonderful children.  Yet, I can’t be putting on something comfortable, if all it does is make me want to self-destruct.  How do I give up my fat pants?
Husband is my fat pants

Dear Husband is my fat pants,
     What an interesting analogy!   Thank you.  When we lose weight and clean out our closets, we do this, so we don’t look back.  We get rid of our fat pants to keep us motivated in our new healthful life choices.  If we keep a pair in the closet, we are likely to put them on and revert back to our unhealthy eating behaviors.  If your husband struggles with infidelity, you and your children are struggling.    If you were truly comfortable with him being unfaithful, you would not be legally separated.  God’s word gives you permission to seek divorce if a spouse is unfaithful.  Yet, You don’t have to, you can try to work this out with forgiveness and grace.  You both will have to do whatever it takes to get past the current pain and press forward in a marriage that is pleasing to God.  Being actively married to someone whom is involved in sexual misconduct is not God s’ plan for your life.  Exodus 20:14  “Thou shalt not commit adultery.”  You are a beautiful child of God.  Your husband is to cherish you and you are to respect him.  Do this, not because either one of you earns cherishing or respect, but, treat each other this way because it is Gods’ directive. Ephesians 5:33 “Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.” Can you get back to respecting your husband?  Will he be able to cherish you and you alone?  Absolutely!!  Will you?  That is up to the two of you.  How about altering the fat pants?   You can forgive him and respect him without tolerating infidelity.  He can conquer the adultery beast.  It will take God.  I suggest you both seek sound pastoral counseling.
Romans 10:13  “For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.”
2 Corinthians 5:17  “Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature;  old things are passed away; behold all things become new.

Be fit and be blessed,

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